I read an article recently in which the author posits, “ . . . hope is a longing for a future condition over which you have no agency; it means you are essentially powerless.”
In some situations, sure. If you regard hope akin to the rock Charlie Brown received in his trick-or-treat bag and don’t use it; hope will be precisely that, not because of its nature but because of the eye of the beholder.
But there are far more situations in which hope inspires us to be proactive.
If you know anything about me, you know that I like to think of myself as independent. Ask anyone in my family, and they’ll tell you I was always the kid who wanted to do everything for himself. The realization that I was physically different than all the other kids–and the adults–came hard and fast, along with a desire for others to hold me in the same regard as I did: capable, talented, and just as likable as everyone else. Just noticeably shorter.
As you might have guessed, I’ve been a closet advocate for racial equity and equality for decades, first for my benefit and but now for others. Being “othered” and seeing it done to others is nothing new. But neither is knowing there are people out there to help set things right, to open career doors (like Cindy White, Dale T. Moore, and Valerie Oberle), to encourage and inspire me to keep on keepin’ on (Elsie Gene Adams, Alison Queal Warrell), and who magnanimously helped make my dreams a reality (Kathy Van Tassell, Joseph Gardner, Linda Haberman, and countless more).
The following is a reflection on the sixty-two-year friendship between the late Mrs. Elsie Gene Adams and Mr. Clay Rivers. This memorial was given by Mr. Rivers at Grace Episcopal Church, White Plains, New York, on January 27, 2024, at the request of Mrs. Adams’ daughters.
Joan, Jeanette, Cynthia, and Eris, family members, Father Moronta, Grace Episcopal parishioners, friends, and guests—greetings. It’s an honor to be with you today to reflect on our beloved Elsie Gene Adams.
I so wanted to share neat little packaged anecdotes that would hopefully make you smile and bring you, at the very least, a hint of comfort, but I can’t. I am bereft, unmoored, and floundering on storm-tossed waves of sadness and grief. The loss is unspeakable, as no words give meaning to my sorrow. I am a man come undone.
Mrs. Adams was both a second mother and third grandmother to me. Most importantly, she understood me better than anyone else ever has. She was—hands down—my best friend.
I miss her deeply.
HGTV’s new “it” couple and hosts of the smash Home Town, Ben and Erin Napier, are back in a new limited series, Home Town Takeover (HGTV, Sundays, 8:00 p.m. ET/PT). This time around, the Napiers are using their home renovation talents to breathe life into the floundering small town of Wetumpka, Alabama, as seen in the Ewan McGregor and Albert Finney film, Big Fish. And if you’re not careful, you may just pick up a thing or two about inclusion and community along the way.
Home renovation shows are nothing new. HGTV has perfected the art of combining likable hosts, adventures in house hunting and home repair, and the requisite “unforeseen” bump in the road to create the enviable HGTV happy endings we’ve come to expect. But Home Town Takeover takes these familiar pieces and turns them into something bigger and more meaningful than the sum of its parts.
An Open Letter to an Our Human Family Reader
Dear Reader,
Thank you for your thoughtful and gracious letter regarding the efforts of the Our Human Family writers and editorial staff. I’m sure you didn’t know the email address to which you submitted your letter would lead back to me.
It’s easy to lose sight of the good in the world, but it’s out there, doing it thing - in ways you never expected. You just have to know what to look for and where to find it. The answer’s a lot more accessible and potent than many would have you believe.
I hate. A lot.
Yes, the guy who ends his essays with Christ’s second command to “love one another,” hates. There, I said it.
We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.
–Albert Einstein
Humans. We’re reactive by nature. Give me a puppy, a sweet potato pie, a lump of gold, or a month-long vacation in France, and I’ll give you a positive reaction every time. A boa constrictor, lima beans, a lump of coal in my Christmas stocking, or a fresh parking ticket will produce a reaction somewhere along the negative end of the emotional spectrum.
If you think that not using labels when referring to “other” people is all it takes to make you post-racial, pull up a chair. It’s time we had a little chat.
I’ll keep this short.
Roseanne Barr. What hasn’t been said about her? How about this? She’s thoughtful, well-grounded, humble, and socially aware. Or perhaps, she has an unparalleled sense of nuance in areas of race, equality, and social justice. No? What about this then? She’s a pioneer at finding new frontiers that unite all Americans.
